Sunday, November 20, 2005

Blogging Motives

It�s been ages since I last updated. I wun go about the usual thick-skinned banter of how people might have missed my witty/clever/whimsical (ur list of cool adjectives here) entries.

To be frank, wasn�t really in the blogging mood for a long, long time.

Digression: Am currently typing out this entry in Microsoft Word with Blogger for Word plug-in. And I am greatly perturbed by the fact that words such as �blog�, �blogger�, �blogging� and the likes are not in the Microsoft dictionary yet!! How intriguing!! If they had recognized the growing influence, potential and impact that blogging has in today�s context, so much so that they even made a plug-in for it in order to stay relevant; isn�t it a slap in the face that words such as �blogs� are NOT in the dictionary that spell-check uses???    

Ok, back to my entry. Not that I do not feel for anything for the past few month. Just that, the initial doubt about blogging is beginning to gnaw the back of my mind again.

To me, there�s basically there�s 2 schools of bloggers. One dat make use of the blogosphere to comment, critique and lament on issues of the �real world�, i.e. issues that we read about in the papers or hear on the news (read: terrorist attacks, tsunamis, what-have-you); or issues that will otherwise be left forlorn and forgotten by the mainstream media. (read: Issues like whether a handicapped toilet should be or could be used by the general public with no disabilities. Who in the right frame of mind will write to the forums on such issues??) In my humble opinion, the latter is the more constructive of the 2, spurring the blogosphere to think outta the box and bring attention to issues that will generally be overlooked. But nonetheless, the former also give rise to alternative views that will otherwise be censored or deem inappropriate in the �real world�, where there can NEVER be freedom of speech. Institutions and government bodies are �monitoring� and �drawing guidelines� to direct how people should blog already. What more to come? Why are they trying to claw at every single avenue where people can really speak their mind?? Are they trying to create another �Speakers� Corner�? (read: White elephant.) Speaking of which, they almost sued the witty fella who put up cute placards of white elephants around the unused Buangkok mrt station. Freedom of speech. WooT~! (Probably some SAF or MINDef personnel is reading every single character that I have posted now.)

Whether it is of issues of whatever nature, it takes great intellect, analytic skills and in-sight on issues for one to blog meaningful, thought-provoking entries� which largely translates to time consumed in killing brain cells, and churning out such gems of blogs. Which, sad to say, was not exactly the kind of thing I felt like doing.

The other school of bloggers treats a blog like an online virtual diary and post every bit of nitty-gritty details of their life, their thoughts, their daily encounters etc on it. TMI, IMHO. Most of the time, such blogs inevitably became a shrine or altar or watever where one makes full use to boast, brag and flaunt how successful one can get. That is for the super optimistic individuals� and on the other end of the scale, we see extreme pessimists lamenting on how sad, pathetic, forlorn, forgotten and lonely one can get blah blah blah. Not that I really care. For me, I have no wish to fall into any of such categories. Hence, my prolonged absence from the blogosphere..

But still, it is interesting to know that there ARE people who actually reads the kind of non sequitur rants and ramblings that I post here. And when suddenly, outta the blue, someone you least expect came up to you and said: �I read your blog.� Will you be left flabbergasted for a good 15 seconds like me, trying to recall what exactly did I post and what conclusion of me as a person will that person have of me, when he/she reads of the things I wrote without expecting them to be reading??? Did such thoughts ever cross your mind? That is also why I question the credibility of posts by the previously mentioned 2nd school of bloggers who blogs really personal and intimate content. Are the content really that credible, if the so-called �innermost thoughts� that you are posting is on a medium that you already know that ANYONE can be reading. Are you really dumb or you are just stupid?? Or is it that you think you are so ingenious that you can gain sympathy by painting this virtual impression that you are such an oh-so-poor-thing and manipulate people and spur their emotions to your advantage? Well, I seriously hope not, cos if you really thought so, den I seriously think YOU SHOULD JUST KILL YOURSELF. Na�ve. If you can think of it, chances are, people thought of it too and they know what you are doing. It is just that they did not wish to voice out or expose what you are doing.

Frankly speaking, having said so much, I seriously do not know what my motives for blogging are.. partly because, I dun even know who my audiences are, other than those that told me to shock me. That is probably the reason why I do not really update regularly. Maybe I just want a place where I can blog about the little things that made my day.. the bits of happy memories that I may have, which I know, will not last. So that I can try to convince myself that I do have quite a happy life. So that I can look back at these past entries and bring back some happy memories, and maybe a smile. But for now, I cannot find any such things to blog about.

But why do I want to do that in the first place? I have asked many of my friends this same question:

�If there is a day where you have to decide, whether to forgo all your happy memories, or all that is sad, which one will you let go?�

Almost all told me that they will willingly let go of all their sad memories, but I chose the latter. Reason being that I believe that humans are never satiable. If we already have happy memories to compare with, I will want more to bring me happiness. A simple curry puff which brought me great joy to me in the past no longer satisfies me. A simple gesture made by others that touched me greatly then might not have an effect on me now. Everyone yearn for something more that what they have already got. I guess it is not exactly a desirable trait, but I guess it is just a human nature that is in-borne and just not possible to eradicate.    

Conversely, if I only have sad memories, yes, I will probably not be very happy initially, but at the very least, every small bit of the tangible and intangible stuff in life will delight me and bring me great joy.

What about you? What will you choose?



                

Cre8tivesparks at 11/20/2005 07:21:00 PM

0 gave a piece of their mind